Drop the mouse and step away from the keyboard...

For the love of God, people, do NOT let me drink and type again.

Geesh.

After I had a bottle of wine a cocktail, I passed out took a nap on the couch, and I have a bitch of a headache feel better now. But after reading what I wrote when I was shitfaced mildly impaired, I've decided that I am grounding myself from the computer when alcohol is involved.

Honestly, I am fine. I was having a bad day, and I've snapped out of it. Hello early menopause PMS.

Bottom line is, he's an asshole, and he never deserved me. Fuck him.

Hell, some idiot even cheated on Halle Berry, so like people have tried to tell me for years, his wandering dick had nothing to do with me.

Speaking of which, I heard what might be my favorite new line....

"If I looked like Halle Berry, I wouldn't need a man. All I'd need is a glass of wine, a candle, and a full length mirror."

Makes me laugh just typing it.

I'm off to watch Sarah Palin Tina Fey on SNL. Rumor has it the real pitbull with lipstick is going to be on as well...

Thanks for indulging me tonight. I'll be funny again tomorrow, I promise.

Wait...I *am* funny, right?