Does your man drive you crazy?

Seriously. Does your man drive you crazy?

Because mine does.

Batshit crazy some days.

And I know I'm not alone in this! My two BFF's have the same issue with their husbands. These men do idiotic shit and just don't THINK.

They don't think about what they are doing.

Or what they are saying.

They don't think rationally, or logically.

They don't listen.

They don't see past whatever is right in front of them, and see big picture.

And it drives me up a wall.

Let me give you a recent example.

For 4 days prior to getting my foot tattoo, I told my guy that A) I was getting a tattoo on my foot, and B) Because it's on my foot, I will not be able to put a tennis shoe (or any other shoe for that matter other than a ballet flat) on for a week. Therefore, I will not be going to the gym to walk on the treadmill until it heals a week from now.

We discussed this the morning of the tattoo appointment even.

So literally, as I'm getting the frickin tattoo, he calls me to see what I'm doing and I'm like....'Getting my tattoo....' and he says....wait for it...

"Are we going to the gym when you get home?"

No. No, we aren't.

This is just one of many examples I could give you. It drives me crazy.

What is it about men that make them this way? Is it age? Is their testosterone dropping so rapidly that not only does the little head stop being attentive but the big one does as well? Are they going deaf? Developing dementia? Have the years of partying in their 20's finally caught up with their brain cells?

Listen, I am not the smartest cookie in the jar. I'm intelligent, but I'm not getting invited to join Mensa anytime soon. But there are times that I look at him and I'm like...blink blink...because even my brain can't fathom what the hell he's thinking!

Do you have this problem with your man? If so, how have you not suffocated him with a pillow yet?

Happy Anniversary, Hot Stuff!

Dear Big T:

I'm not good with cards, especially mushy ones (we both know who the romantic one in this relationship is, and it's not this girl).

I contemplated showing you my love through interpretive dance, but then quickly realized that could be your deal breaker, thus making this our first and only anniversary.

So to celebrate the 1 year anniversary of us getting a second chance at Happily Ever After, I decided to do what I do best and write you a blog post.

Here goes:

On August 5, 2010, I came to see you at the Dolphin Lounge and watch you entertain the masses with your amazing humor and wit. And frankly, nothing says happy reunion like a dive bar in Gahanna. But I was quickly reminded why I fell in love with you fourteen years earlier. You make me laugh. And, you're really hot.

Two days later we went on our first real date....and it involved the Titanic. Now, some people might have seen that as a bad sign...but not us. We (and by we, I mean 'me') saw it as a great jumping off point for our new relationship, and we would either sink or swim. (OK I'm stretching it a little bit here, really I didn't give it a lot of thought until two months later when we booked a cruise, and then I got a little worried about starting this relationship out with a sinking ship and hoped it wouldn't end that way!)

The next day, I invited you to dinner with the family. Might as well get it out of the way right off the bat, right?

The next couple of weeks were spent getting to know each other again. And then one night we went to Cincinnati to gamble and have a great dinner....

....., and on the way home you made me an offer I couldn't refuse. For the sake of anyone else reading this, I won't detail that offer.

And that, my love, was when this thing kicked into high gear.

From that point on, we had a blast:

Sent the kid off to college:

But reminded ourselves where we started:

We went to Hocking Hills:

Gatsby's:

Another casino trip:

Making out somewhere during karaoke:

A hotel in Cincinnati where your 6 keeps showing up:

Went back to karaoke (Elizabeth is persuasive!)

Made out again:

Made out with friends this time:

But there's no grey area, it's all black and white with us, baby.

Celebrated my 50th:

And then really celebrated on the high seas:

You got bit by a Foo Dog:

And I got a vagina towel animal. WTF?

The number 6 was everywhere:

Except on my birthday. That was brought to you by the grossly inflated numbers 5 and 0...

We hung out in Costa Maya:

And Belize:

Had lots of fun in Roatan, Honduras:

....and I love you but you know I'm not letting a damn bird near ME:

Then it was on to Cozumel:

And the turtle tattoo idea was born:

One last picture in Cozumel:

And then it was our last night on the boat....

But we woke up in New Orleans on Bourbon Street:

We came home and made it official...and Big T & Little T were born.

We went to Luna Pier:

And Danica's wedding....

Spent July 4th in Granville....

....with our new Turtle Power friend.

Even got our cars into the act...

We lost someone we love, but I take great comfort in knowing she loved you dearly...and was so happy we found each other again.

And I know she's looking down on us, and smiling because we are together.

So this is my love letter to you.

Thank you for the best year of my life (so far). We've had a few bumps in the road, because let's face it, neither of us are perfect. But we are perfect for each other, and I've never been happier.

I can't promise you will ever get that hot Asian girl fantasy fulfilled, but I promise to give you my best in this relationship every single day.

Here's to this being the first of many amazing and wonderful years ahead of us.

I love you, baby.

Little T

My favorite quote today

Frankly, this week sucks on so many levels.



I need a drink. Or 5.

Get in here and sing for me.

My friend Dana over at Life Is Good had a great post today about a song that reminds of her a big life changing relationship event.

And I realized that we all have "that song", don't we? Not necessarily even one song, but many that remind of us of life events.

I have always connected music to things in my life. There are tons of songs that remind me of moments that I will never forget. Some good, some bad. Most are related to past and present men in my life (haha) but some are just other things that when I hear them, take me back to feelings I haven't felt for a long time.

Here's a few of mine....

'Everybody Wants You' by Billy Squier. An old boyfriend from back in the early 80's always told me this song reminded him of me. Mine for him is "Still The Same" by Bob Seger. I found out recently that he passed away about 5 years ago, and it really made me sad to think he's gone, but when I hear either of these songs, I smile at his memory.

'Leaving On A Jet Plane' by Peter, Paul & Mary. This song was playing in my sister's hospital room the very minute that we had to disconnect life support. I know this probably seems morbid to you that I think about it, but it was a really beautiful moment, because she LOVED to travel, and it was such an appropriate song. It is guaranteed to this day to make me cry when it comes on the radio, but if you look closely at me you will also see me grasping her hand just as I did that day in 2004 as we let her go. I swear I think she's reaching out and holding mine at that moment just to say hi.

'Push It' by Salt n Pepa. This one is an easy one, back in 1988 when my BFF Cheri was in labor with her son Alex, I kept singing this song to her. She tried to hurt me several times in between contractions. LOL

'At Last' by Etta James. This is my Mom's favorite song. She used to ask me to play it for her all the time. When I get married again, we will dance to it for her.

'You'll Think of Me' by Keith Urban. This song was popular the summer I was going through divorce hell. It was 100% appropriate for my situation. It still hurts when I hear it.

'Before He Cheats' by Carrie Underwood. I think this is self explanatory! Fortunately it was released in 2006, about 6 months after my divorce, so I had calmed down by then. Had it come out during that mess, I'd have definitely needed bailed out of jail because without a doubt I'd have dug my key into the side of his pretty little souped up four wheel drive, and carved my name into his leather seats....

'Paradise By The Dashboard Light' by Meat Loaf. This song used to remind me of high school as it was released when I was a junior, however in the past year it's become the song that my BFF Elizabeth and my BBE (Best Boyfriend Ever) Michael sing during karaoke. Now, I can't hear it without seeing the two of them performing it and it makes me laugh out loud.

'Wicked Game' by Chris Issac. Oh, this song. When Michael and I first dated 14 years ago, we had an immediate connection that caught fire and blazed out of control. It was crazy. And after we broke up (ok after HE broke up with me) I would hear this song and it would drive me nuts...

The world was on fire and no one could save me but you.
It's strange what desire will make foolish people do.
I never dreamed that I'd love somebody like you.
And I never dreamed that I'd lose somebody like you.

(He says our song back then was 'Truly, Madly, Deeply', but I don't remember that. At best I'll give him 'All My Life' by K-Ci and JoJo. Whatev.)

So flash forward to last August, and we had gotten back together and were dating again, but hadn't taken "that next step", right? We were both trying to take it slow and keep our wits about us knowing that once it got to that level, it was gonna be game on. (Hey, I'm just being honest. We have an AMAZING physical connection!) So the weekend that we charged full speed ahead with our relationship, we were laying in bed talking and naturally this song comes on! (OK we weren't actually talking now that I think about it!) And I remember thinking that I hope this isn't a sign that I'm gonna get hurt again now that I've just gotten fully invested in this relationship, because I'm gonna be really pissed off if he breaks up with me AGAIN.

Lucky for him, 10 months later we're still going strong. But I still can't hear 'Wicked Game' without thinking of him and us. It's such a hot song. LOL

Here, now you can think about it to:



So tell me, what songs remind you of events in your life?

It's Official! My honey and I are....

....getting tattoos together!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

When we were on the cruise, we got henna tattoos on our wrists of a sea turtle.

(OK yes, for the last time....he hadn't had time to take his shoes/socks off when I snapped the picture of our wrists! Good God, this was a huge issue on Facebook that he had socks on at beach. I can assure you, he was taking them off. See his bare right foot between our arms!)

Back to the tattoo...

OK so we have a running joke between us about turtles. It started 14 years ago and has to do with "Turtle Power", and you can let your imagination wander about what it means. LOL I wanted a henna tattoo while we were in Honduras, but didn't get one, but at the next port which was Cozumel, I got one, and so did he. The guy freehanded the turtle and we both loved the design. Mine was on my left wrist, his was on his right, so when we held hands they touched.

Gag. LOL I know, I know.

Anyway, this is his. It was a little clearer design than mine, and you can see that the top is the head of the turtle and it's going up his arm....

I loved having mine on my wrist, I've been wanting a tattoo there for years and figured the best way to try it was a temp one like this. LOVE LOVE LOVE IT.

SOOOOOOO....Honey says "Let's make them permanent!"

And I agreed immediately.

Problem is, he can't have it on his wrist for professional reasons. We had a tough time agreeing where to put them, we kind of wanted them in the same places on our bodies but that's not gonna happen. Where he wants to put his, I either already have one, or don't want one there.

So we compromised, mine is going inside my left ankle, his is going outside of his right lower leg.

We get them on Saturday.

I'll post pictures on Sunday!

You gotta love a man who wants to get a tattoo with you. I reminded him this is *really permanent*, and that he will think of me every day for the rest of his life when he sees it, and he said...

"What makes you think I don't already? I'm the one who remembers everything about us from 14 years ago....you put it all out of your mind!"

The man has a point. In my defense, I truly believed I blacked it all out because it was too painful to remember how happy I was back then, when we had broken up and both gone on to other not-as-happy relationships.

Yeah, nothing says commitment like a tattoo, kids. You can take a ring off, but a tattoo is forever.

This will NEVER be acceptable in my world.

I can tolerate a lot of things.

But this...no.

Someone needs to tell my beloved boyfriend that if he insists on wearing this type of thing on his feet, he will be doing so as a single man.

(NO, this is not a picture of him. I just found one online as an example of the horror.)

He tried this once. Oh yes he did. Snuck one by me. I was blinded by love, I tell ya.

This fall, when he had a comedy gig, I didn't realize until we got there that he had these frickin sandals on with dark socks.

Thank God he had jeans on to basically cover up his feet, but still. Had I noticed them, he'd have never left the house like that.

I. Don't. Do. Nerd.

I'm sorry, I just don't. I was married to a total computer geek but at least he had decent taste in footwear.

(That's one of the few good things I have to say about the man.)

So please, somebody warn my guy that if he insists on wearing sandals with socks, we will not be seen in public together.

And could you please warn him BEFORE we set sail to the Caribbean in 23 days? If he's okay with this look, I'm truly fearing the rest of the Cruise Couture.

Hot Damn I'm Happy

Like seriously, dude. I'm happy as hell.

Not only in my romantic life (which is fanfuckingtastic), but just overall. I'd do one of those little Lucky Charms side heel clicks if I were only coordinated enough and wouldn't break something in the process!

Yesterday I closed a house, and was reminded again how much I really do enjoy selling real estate. And that commission check certainly added to my joy as I deposited it into my bank account today. I really need to work on marketing myself this year, and getting a few more transactions under my belt. It's a great source of additional income, and something I enjoy doing. Hello Captain Obvious....so go DO IT.

Our cruise is 54 days away, and I am getting SO FRICKIN EXCITED! We're looking into excursions at the various ports now. The itinerary changed a bit, instead of being on at sea on my actual birthday, we'll be in Costa Maya, Mexico. So we'll find some fun little thing to do there. The next stop in Belize, I found a great zipline/rappelling tour thing that we've gotta do!

(Forget the fact that I'm scared of heights, and the zipline soars over the treetops of the rainforest!)

I don't have any overwhelming desire to "swim" with dolphins, and I don't know how to scuba or snorkel, but there are a kajillion other options at the various ports, so I know we'll have a blast.

AND...we booked our airfare Sunday and I really am happy about that....I've been watching flights daily for the past month and could never find anything under $450 per person for us. Sunday, I decided to check as we were watching TV, and with a little compromise on time, we booked them for $250 each. Yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The nice thing is that we get off the ship at 8am on Sunday the 27th, and then will have all day in New Orleans (Hello Bourbon Street!) to enjoy the sites and then fly out Monday morning.

Let's see....what else....

Oh yeah, my beloved boyfriend TEXTED ME today.

Now, you may not find that newsworthy, until you understand that he has refused to text for the entire six months we've been together. He doesn't like it, he doesn't want to communicate that way, and he's flat out said...NO, I won't do it. (You have to realize, he would really prefer to not even carry a cell phone, and the one he has is like the Pinto of cell phones...old and beat up and not technologically advanced at all!) I text him on occasion because he'll read them, he just won't respond.

So today I'm driving along in my car and my text goes off, and when I picked up my phone and saw his name and the message, for a minute it didn't dawn on me *what* it was....then all of a sudden I was like "OMG, I just got a text from Michael!" And then I almost wrecked my car. LOL

The best part was that it was a cute little text reminding me of something that happened this past weekend, so not only was it sweet that he was thinking about me, and sweeter that he was making me laugh with what he said, but sweetest of all was that it came via TEXT.

My God, there is hope after all. Hahahahahahahahahaha. (If you're reading this blog post, I love you, honey! Thank you for the text and I promise if you send me more, I won't turn every one of them into blog fodder!)

I love my life. And I *love* being happy.