Hey baby let's go to Vegas....

Come on...I'll take you on a tour.

First of all, here's Three Bitchin Babes right after they first met. We go straight from airport to casino bar. Best threesome I've ever had. LOL



Then we headed back to Linda's place, after a quick stop at Whole Foods, and had more drinks and girl talk. And salad.



Saturday we got up and went to breakfast at this place called the Original Pancake House. It was fabulous. I had chocolate crepes. Weight Watchers Points Value = Eleventy Billion.



(Actually they weren't *that* bad, and I really only ate like one of the three.)

Here's the Lovely Ladies at breakfast. Or, as I lovingly refer to us, the number 110. Skinny bitches.



We shopped for awhile afterwards, and then went back to Linda's place so Darlene could pack. We only had a brief 19 hours with her as she had to get back to CA to work, but we sure made the best of it.

I love this woman. She's so damn cute I just wanted to squeeze her. In fact, I might have.



After she left, Linda and I both took naps! We'd been up late the night before and of course I was dealing with a three hour time difference, plus Linda's boyfriend was taking out to dinner and to see a band that night.

We went to the Elephant Bar for dinner, here is Linda and her mister at dinner:



Later we went to Boulder Station to hear this amazing classic cover rock band called Yellow Brick Road. Hands down best band ever. Every damn song they did sounded exactly like the original. They channelled Journey, Boston, Foreigner, Led Zeppelin, Queen, David Bowie, you name it. Fan-fucking-tastic.

Eventually I went out to the bathroom and got sidetracked by a video poker machine. (It was right outside the bar and I could hear the band perfectly!) Turns out I won $45! I was all excited. So never one to allow money to burn a hole in my pocket, I ventured over to the Blackjack table and proceeded to play on that same $45, and still leave with it as well! Might not have won anymore, but I didn't lose either.

The next day Linda and I got up and went to the pool to float around for a couple of hours and burn off the alcohol seeping from our pores. Linda's mister had left his cell phone at her place the night before and as we were floating around the pool this man walks up to the gate and says hi to us. Linda smiles really big and says "Hey you!!!!!" very enthusiastically and VERY flirtatiously....because without her contacts in, she thought it was her man!!! It was hilarious. The guy was looking for his lost dog...however had Linda not been floating around on a raft he may have gotten a welcome he hadn't bargained for!

Later Sunday afternoon we went to this great biker bar at the top of a mountain.



Very cool place. Nice bikes...



And cute boys.



I'd have taken one for the team if necessary. I'm just sayin.

Then we went to a place called Cactus Joe's, where I met my future husband.



Dammit, I could have been Mrs. Cactus Joe, because he took a liking to me. But, seeing how he just wasn't my type, I had to pass.

Cactus Joe had weird plants. I think he was smoking them.



Then we went to Red Rock Casino and had dinner, and went back to Linda's to put our comfy clothes on and settle in on the patio for an evening of girl talk. I had my first and last Double Chocolate Stout beer. Damn, I don't know how that girl drinks this stuff. Sorry, Linda...but chocolate and dark beer do not go well together in MY book!

Monday, we took a drive out to Lake Mead. We stopped at a casino for a bit, and snapped some pictures.

This is looking at the lake through some mountain'y kinds of rock thingys.



Here's Linda in front of the rocks.



And me. Same location.



Notice how tiny SHE looks in front of the rocks. I look *like* a rock. Skinny bitch. I really don't like her.

We left there and went to The.Only.Place.To.Eat.In.Vegas.

In N Out.

If you've never been there before, put this on your Bucket List. It's the best place ever.



HOWEVER....my burger and fries was a whopping 20 points on Weight Watchers! That's right, between my coffee with creamer for breakfast, and In N Out at 11:30, I'd had 24 of my 27 daily allotted points. Eh, fuck 'em. I love me some In N Out. I'll drink water the rest of the day. LOL



I did a little more gambling that day, won another $25 on Blackjack, and then we drove around for awhile, looked at a condo Linda was interested in, and did a little shopping.

Early evening, we headed to Mandalay Bay and had dinner at the House of Blues. I discovered a beer I finally like:



Yes, it does taste...well...weak. But I love any beer that doesn't taste like beer! So this is officially my new beer of choice.

Here's Skinny Bitch Linda Lou after dinner:



Then as it was getting dark, we headed down Las Vegas Boulevard.

Day Four...she finally takes me to The Strip. (This is a running joke between us, don't think I'm busting her chops about it!)






My last day there, Tuesday, Linda had to go to work, so I spent the morning reading her soon-to-be-published book 'Bastard Husband: A Love Story'. IT IS FABULOUS. I could not put it down. It confirmed what I suspected that we married the same man, and she showed me that there is wonderful life after such a disappointing disaster. When this book comes out, every damn one of you better buy one. For $5 I'll get her to autograph it for you.

After reading, I decided to relax on the patio, getting the last rays of desert sun before I had to get ready to go home. This was my view:



Linda's mister was gracious enough to pick me up and drive me to the airport, so at 1:30 I bade farewell to her place and headed to McCarran for my 3:30 flight. I love Vegas, and I love these most of all....



I always know when I see these, that I'm someplace that makes me very happy.

On the way home, I snapped a couple of pictures of clouds, just because I could. This was, of course, after we finally took off an hour late after waiting on Obama and Air Force One to land! Saw his plane, but couldn't get a picture fast enough.

Anyway...clouds.





I had an amazing vacation. Meeting these two ladies was like seeing old friends I just hadn't seen for awhile. There was no weirdness or awkwardness, just three women screaming and hugging in the airport like fools. They are both such wonderful women, I cannot say enough good things about either of them. I just don't have the right words to convey to the rest of you who haven't had the privilege to meet them like I have.

Dar, I wish you could have stayed with us longer. I missed you terribly the minute you left! Even though we didn't have a lot of time then, I know without a doubt we will have plenty of time together in the future. I will happily be your new travel buddy! I love you, and I am always wishing the best for you and Mr. J. Everything will work out the way it's meant to...

Linda, I cried when we said goodbye, and I tear up even thinking about it now. You are an amazing woman, and I want to be you when I grow up! Thank you again for opening your home...and your heart...to this stranger friend from Ohio. I know for certain that we will be lifelong friends. Give your mister a big hug from "Jules". I love you, sister.

And readers, I hope you enjoyed my trip as much as I did! Oh, and by the "weigh", I lost .7 of a lb while in Vegas according to my weigh in when I got back. I'll take it. I thought I'd gain at least 5 lbs while I was gone!

Dammit, could have had another In N Out...