Bachelor #2 for the year...and I might actually like this one!

OK, I haven't been dabbling in the dating pool too much this year, kind of resigned myself to the fact that I wasn't really meeting anyone who made me want to actually get to know them and/or actually go out on a date.

Then I met Joe. Well, cybermet him. Haven't met him in person yet.

Here's his profile:

Father of four whose life is centered mostly on his kids (sometimes to their extreme dismay). Girls, 12 and 15. Boys, 17 and 19.

Hoping to meet someone to love, honor and cherish. (And, no, the phrase isn't a cliche because it's not repeated enough.) A woman with the Three Cs: Character, Class and Compassion. A role model for my girls.

I'm not asking for much: Only to wake up early every morning for the rest of my life, look at the beautiful sleeping figure beside me, and be reminded why I get up for those cold-morning jogs and start work before everyone else.

The inner peace of a loving relationship polishes out the rough edges of life. I realize that the love and respect one seeks isn't merely GRANTED. It must be EARNED, which is why I try to maintain my sense of honor and a commitment to something greater than just me.

On days off I'll do just about anything involving fresh air and sunlight. I golf when I can and answer my kids' challenges in driveway basketball games. During the warmer months I look forward to sailing, backpacking, touring or cycling. For me, "outdoors" could also mean "out in the garage" where I tinker on two old cars (usually before I have them towed to someone who knows what he's doing). Started running again, and lifting weights since my son humiliated me in a "friendly" competition.

Lately I spend lots of time walking dogs, ours and those at the local shelter, where my daughter is a volunteer. Active in numerous community organizations (was scoutmaster of the local troop for several years). Long ago I was a Marine, so today I'm involved with a group that helps wounded Marines and their families.

Some have called my business successful. (Wasn't always that way.) To me it's not a success until I'm on the golf course while SOMEONE ELSE is running it!

I'm an excellent shopper! This means I'm very good at standing by in stores I would never visit while she pores thorugh aisles of merchandise I would never think of buying. (Oh. Except as a gift, of course!)

I'm also a (functional) dancer! Had the good fortune to take a series of dance lessons with a beautiful woman I dated last year.

I've found that cooking, menu-planning and grocery shopping are the hardest parts of being a single dad. I'll always appreciate a good recipe ( so if you're looking for a way to break the ice -- wink-wink, hint-hint.)

FULL DISCLOSURE --

-- I should probably mention that my hair is thin in back. (Well, OK. It's a bald spot.) Won't be doing a comb-over because my daughters begged -- and I mean BEGGED -- me not to.

-- The running I mentioned is really more of a jog. (Well, OK. It's probably more of a shuffle than a jog. Incredible to think that I once ran faster and farther with boots, helmet, pack and rifle.)

-- About my divorce (and all I should ever say about it): Married 17 years until she decided to become a "free agent", so to speak. Spent two years trying to dissuade her, and another 16 months in court, arguing for residential custody. (Lost both.) Was I the perfect husband? No. But I learn from my mistakes.

AND I SHOULD PROBABLY ADD ...

1. While I'd certainly be flattered to hear from you, I'm not seeking another pen pal. If I'm not someone you'd like to meet reasonably soon, then please don't write.

2. I love all kids. Including yours. Nothing you're doing is more important than raising them.

3. Lots of weirdos on line; I'm NOT one of them. (Well ... OK. But I'm harmless.) You'll find me open and accessible. If we get to a third date and I still don't know your address or last name, then I'll take it as suspicion, quirkiness and mistrust. Not exactly the foundation of a lasting relationship.

4. If we find there's some chemistry but you live out of town, I don't mind driving to spend an afternoon or evening with you. Once, maybe twice. After that, I'll need a good reason. (I know what you're thinking and no, I'm NOT suggesting THAT!)

5. If you're a bit overweight, no problem! I can hardly be critical. The question is: what are WE doing about it? Maintaining good health signals respect to one's mate.

6. Don't care about your past; hopefully you've learned from it. Don't care about your ex-; I doubt he's quite the rascal others have portrayed him to be. Don't care about your faith; it is best expressed by one's example, rather than by one's sermon. Don't care about your politics, grey hair, fashion choices, reading glasses or messy house. I'm more interested in your character.

7. If I can post MY picture and still get responses, then you have nothing to fear by posting yours.

First Date The zoo! Otherwise a hike in nice weather seems to me a great way to get to know someone. (But I completely understand if, after seeing my picture and reading my prose, you'd rather not be alone in the woods with me. So here are some alternatives: )

Bike rides are nice but it's hard to talk if you're riding single-file most of the time. We could golf nine holes, go to the movies, go to a favorite restaurant, visit a museum (there's one in Indiana I heard about), attend the symphony (I love Classical) or we could just kick the teenagers out of the house and download some old movies.

Of course, if you have a canine companion, feel free to bring it along and we can go out for a walk. If conversation becomes difficult, the dogs will give us something to talk about. (Although, if you've read this far, you've probably surmised that running out of things to say has never been a problem of mine.)

Good so far, eh?

We've exchanged numerous emails. He thinks I'm gorgeous. He wears glasses, I think he might need a new prescription. I'm trying not to freak out over the 4 kids issue, with only one of them being a legal adult, when I just got mine grown and on his own (OK yes he still lives with me but we're roommates now much more than mother/son). I'll be honest, he seems very nice...not the type I'm typically attracted to but at this age I'm thinking brains before brawn, you know?

So anyway...that's where things stand. We are getting acquainted via email, and we'll see if there's enough interest to meet....

I'm ready. I really am. It's taken me a long time to let go of my ex and be really, and truly, ready to start over with someone new. I wish I could say I'm "over" him. I'm not. I'm not over my marriage ending the way it did. I'm not over what his affair did to me. But something I read not long ago on one of my friend's blogs was spoken by her therapist, and while it dealt with two losses she's suffered that are completely different than my situation, it still resonated with me...

“You will never be over this. The goal is that you live your life in spite of it.”

So *that* is what I am trying to do. Live my life, and be happy again.

The day after our wedding, as my ex and I stood in a buffet line in Las Vegas, I remember looking at him and saying "Doesn't being this happy feel amazing??" And it did. And I was. I had no idea I could ever be that happy, until then. I was in love. I was married. I was on my way to Happily Ever After.

I'm ready to be that happy again. I'm ready to share that kind of happiness with someone else.

Who knows if it will be this guy or not? Only time will tell. But, at least I'm finally ready to give someone an honest chance...