Just before the funeral services, the undertaker came up to the very elderly widow and asked, 'How old was your husband?'
'98,' she replied. 'Two years older than me'
'So you're 96,' the undertaker commented.
She responded, 'Hardly worth going home, is it?
Reporters interviewing a 104-year-old woman:
'And what do you think is the best thing about being 104?' the reporter asked.
She simply replied, 'No peer pressure.'
The nice thing about being senile is you can hide your own Easter eggs.
I feel like my body has gotten totally out of shape, so I got my doctor's permission to join a fitness club and start exercising. I decided to take an aerobics class for seniors. I bent, twisted, gyrated, jumped up and down, and perspired for an hour. But, by the time I got my leotards on, the class was over.
Know how to prevent sagging?
Just eat till the wrinkles fill out.
It's scary when you start making the same noises as your coffee maker.
These days , about half the stuff in my shopping cart says, 'For fast relief .'
THE SENILITY PRAYER :
Grant me the senility to forget the people
I never liked anyway,
The good fortune to run into the ones I do, and
The eyesight to tell the difference.
**********************************************************
By the way, don't forget to check out my son's blog...he's posted his own 25 Random Things...leave him some comment love, will ya?
**********************************************************
I had a great interview with a new brokerage last night, and appears I am going to switch real estate companies! I'm very excited about this!!!!! Wish me luck!
**********************************************************
I did not get to read everyone's blogs last night, and probably won't today. I'm really, really busy at work and working late every night so bear with me if you don't see me commenting for the next week or so. Once I get tax stuff to the accountant, things will slow down and I'll be back to posting real blogs and commenting on yours!!!!!
16 comments:
Those are great!! Now I need a REAL Julie blog post. I need something to liven up my 13 hour work days!
Those are so funny, yet sadly true!!
That senility prayer is hilarious!!
Gotta laugh or else you'll cry. Those were good!
I believe we should all eat until we fill out the wrinkles!!
Very cute!
Good luck with the new brokerage stuff! That's awesome!!
Very good jokes! You got a smile out of me!
Good luck, baby! Make them give you the same time off...we have plans. (I think we still have them.)Going to check out Jordan's post.
Oh, that senility prayer made me chuckle. I will probably need it real soon . . .
Good luck with the new brokerage gig.
KJ
Props to you on the job situation. I am very happy for you, although a bit jealous! Sounds like you have two jobs to choose from, and I have been begging for one for moths now.
Seriously, you go girl! Off to see Jordan's site.
Great post! If you cannot find me, try is-it-just-me-missy.blogspot.com. The blog-gods are messing with me!
very funny.....made my day!
That is too funny!!!
Ahh the start of my near future life. Good luck with the new office.
As for the busy can't read or comment for weeks on end, you are looking at the queen!
I love the Senility Prayer. I actually came across it while I was having some "issues" with a person I don't particularly like. It was the perfect "prayer" for me at the time.
LOL...you always give me a good giggle Julie...off to read your sons 25 things
love it ..to funny!
Post a Comment