Wednesday, February 24, 2010

What does this mean?

So last night I dreamed that my ex was out of town (which, he happens to be right now) and he sent me down to his house for something.

And when I got there, the front door was cracked open.

So I called him and said "Somebody has broken into your house! The door is open!"

And he said "Go in and see who it is."


Thanks for being concerned about my welfare, dude.

So instead I went around to the back and peeked in a window.

And then I saw him.

Well, her.

Yes, a drag queen had broken in and was sitting in the living room.

She was really pretty.

Not my favorite drag queen though (that's Shannel, and I will be posting about my total crush on her soon).

What?  Come on, you cannot possibly be surprised that I have a favorite drag queen!  Doesn't everyone?

Anyway, it wasn't Shannel.  This was someone else. You know how in dreams, faces are foggy but you just know who they are? I don't know exactly who she was, just that she was a really beautiful man in drag woman.

So I asked what she was doing there and she said she overheard me talking to my ex and knew he was out of town, so she was there borrowing a few things.

(Note: My ex doesn't have a supply of hooker heels, feather boas or sequined outfits in his closet....that I know of.)

So I called the Ex back and said "You're in luck, it's a woman. And you're really lucky she has a dick or I'd be kicking your ass right about now."


This tells me one thing.

I need to stop drinking wine and watching RuPaul's Drag Race before bed.


Coffeypot said...

I think you need to get laid!

Paige said...

It could be all those things. But I cannot in good conscience advise anyone to cut out RuPaul. I LOVE that show

Southern Sage said...

I'm ditto @ CP!

Chocolate Covered Daydreams said...

I'd bet anything it was RuPaul.

Although CP may be right as well.

Secretia said...

Dream on Baby, dream on!

Anything Fits a Naked Man said...

Hahaha! This is hysterical! I think you should've joined your drag queen, raided the ex's cupboards, and had a ball! Sorry it was just a dream!

I also agree with CP, but I don't think you should give up ANYTHING! LOVE that show!

Tee aka The Diva's Thoughts said...

Ok that was a wierd dream. lol

I love me some RuPaul.

Oh, and getting laid couldn't hurt either.

Danica said...

LMAO at CP!!

I love RuPaul! Yummie

Linda Medrano said...

Drag Queens and breaking and entering? It sounds like San Francisco! LOL

Dr. Penny said...

I am getting on a plane and taking you to a place where everything will be ok from now on........

Christiejolu said...

OMG! This made me laugh! Not because of your issues. Believe me girl I have tons, but the watching Rupaul's great race and drinking wine comment. Funny!

~Thought's By Dena~ said...

Im thinking you have AWESOME dreams!!! hehe a bit disturbing but awesome

Julie said... argument there, pal.

@Paige...are you watching this season? So you must know who Shannel is from last season? guys always think everything can be solved with sex. Wait, so do I....

@CCD....I think you're right.

@Secretia...I was hoping for some action with the DQ in my dream but alas, I just woke up laughing!

@Anything Fits....Same question as I asked Paige...your fav?

@Tee and Danica...if you love Ru you'd better be watching Drag Race. Ladies...don't fuck it up! LOL (Spoken in my best Ru voice) really does sound like SF!

@Dr Penny....bring it, sister. just love me cuz my issues make you feel so much better about yours. LOL life is awesome but a bit disturbing as well. ;)

Middle Aged Woman Blogging said...

Are you sure you just haven't been reading Perez Hilton? Too funny! You have very entertaining dreams! Are you keeping a journal?

♥Trina♥ said...

And I thought I had weird dreams! LOL

For our 10th anniversary, we went to Key West. There was a bar with drag queen entertainers just down the block from our inn. They hit on John every time we walked by. haha

Under the Influence said...

It's definitely RuPaul and the wine. Maybe try MORE wine so you sleep through the dreams and don't remember them the next morning. :)

Fragrant Liar said...

The verdict is in. You're horny. You must be proactive in your recovery.

gayle said...

Oh no!! So funny!!

Looking Best for the Dress said...

Hi! I started a blog to document my weight loss journey leading up to my wedding and to gain support and encouragement. I decided to keep it totally confidential so that I could be totally honest. Because of this, I can't invite my friends to read along. Feel free to check it out though if it sounds of any interest :) Thanks!

jaded said...

LOL - this is just too freakin funny. I think it means that you need to stop drinking wine before bed. Oh, and like coffeypot wrote, getting laid might be a plan.

BTW, I would have bet a paycheck too (a bi-weekly one at that) that this baby was a boy. Boy or girl, i'm in love.


KaLynn said...

OH MY GOSH!! I had to put my hand over my mouth I was laughing so hard! I am at work and did not want to Kackle out that loud!