Wednesday, December 31, 2008

The Last Bachelor of 2008

I think his email says it all:

(((WOW)))(((WOW)))(((WOW))) Your a Hottie!! The feel of two sets of lips together in a glorious yet subtle union meeting for the first time. Touching lightly at first a mixture of light and soft, long and hard... First lips, then a meeting of tongues that lock in a magical dance to an imaginery beat. There is a passion to this dance,a passion shared between two locked sets of eyes and all of this contained at once inside ...just kiss..........My name is Dan.

I have decided that I will make a New Year's resolution after all. And it's to stay off of Internet dating sites!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Year in Review...or....I'm bored on Tuesday so here you go.

Borrowed this from Simi's blog...I tried to be serious but you know that never works for me.

~ What did you do in 2008 that you'd never done before? Broke up with my ex? Oh wait. I've done that at least once a year since 2005. Let's see...oh I know...I started blogging! Woohoo!

~ Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year? Yes, I resolve to stop making resolutions. I suck at them. They last about 20 minutes into the New Year. I always resolve to lose weight and start exercising, and by noon on New Year's Day I'm running to the kitchen for something with way more calories than necessary. This year, I figure if my resolution is to make no more resolutions, I'm good to go.

~ Did anyone close to you give birth? Like, physically close to me? No, I have not actually witnessed childbirth this year. But some of the young girls I know on the Nest have had babies this year. (Yeah so they are all in their 20's and 30''s not like they are teens...but to me they are young girls! You know who you are...stop laughing as you read this.)

~ Did anyone close to you die? Thankfully, no. Although I may have gleefully fantasized about the demise of certain former spouses people.

~ What countries did you spend time in this year? Um, I'm pretty sure I've been landlocked this year. My passport has nothing on it. I can, however, travel anywhere you would like to send me.

~ What would you like to have in 2009 that you lacked in 2008? A booming real estate business so that I can pay off bills, prepare for helping Jordan with college, and add stamps to my passport. Oh, and I totally logged way too few miles doing the horizontal bop, so I'd be quite happy to have a dancing partner.

~ What dates from 2008 will remain etched upon your memory, and why? Unfortunately I didn't have any dates, at least none worth mentioning. Oh wait, you mean a calendar date?

~ What was your biggest achievement of the year? Waking up every day. And not running over my ex with my car for all the stress and strife he's caused me this year alone.

~ What was your biggest failure? Not closing a house. Had 3 different contracts and none were able to get financed. Arrrrgh.

~ Did you suffer any serious injury or illness? My ego has been bruised a few times.

~ What was the best thing you bought? Q-tips? Hell, I don't know! Groceries? A male gigolo?

~ Whose behaviour merited celebration? My son. He was on the Honor Roll with three A's and a B the first 9 weeks, and this last 9 weeks of school (literally, his he's done on January 14th) he will be again. If he pulls straight A's, I'll need resuscitated.

~ Whose behaviour made you appalled and/or depressed? Oh, I do NOT need to even answer this one. You've been reading my blog for months, if you can't figure this out then put your head up to the monitor right now so that I can slap some sense into it.

~ Where did most of your money go? Credit card bills. And Starbucks.

~ What did you get really, really, really excited about? If I have to think this hard about an answer to this question, then clearly I have not been really, really, really excited about anything this year.

~ What do you wish you'd done more of? Hot, sweaty, breathing hard, sexy, passionate, mind blowing porn sex Exercise.

~ What do you wish you'd done less of? Waste my time on the unchangeable. To quote my best friend Elizabeth...

You happened to choose a fellow who just plain is who he is, and won't ever change, and you made it your mission in life to make him into someone else. And when it didn't work, you turned it on yourself, like you had fallen short somewhere. It would be like me buying a dog, and then spending the next 7+ years trying to get it to act like a cat, and then feeling awful about myself and mistrusting every other dog on the planet because I couldn't turn this one into something that purrs instead of barks. So let that dog be the dog he was born to be and go find yourself another pet. Out of all the millions of men in this world, many of which who are very GOOD men.... stop letting this one insignificant petty little person define your entire being. There's a whole world out there full of really great things, and you'll never find them if you stay sitting on the couch wishing your dog were a cat. Accept that he's a dog and let him go piss in someone else's yard.
She wrote that to me in an email back in May, and it still makes me laugh out loud to this day.

~ Did you fall in love in 2008? No, but it's only Dec 30th. I have plenty of time. Actually, I fell OUT of love in 2008. Finnnnnnnnnnnallllyyyyyyyyyyyy.

~ How many one-night stands? I so wish I had a number to plug in here. Unfortunately, I'm not a one-nighter kind of gal. Now, if anyone's got a weekend they want to spend with me...

~ Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year? I still "strongly dislike" the same woman I've "strongly disliked" since April of 2005. (I try not to hate anyone. That level of internal poison causes wrinkles that I can't afford to have!) That will never, ever, ever, ever, ever change.

~ What was the best book you read? The Last Lecture. When Randy Pausch died, I cried my eyes out. He was simply the best.

~ What did you want and not get? Botox. And Restylane. Hey, I'm being honest.

~ What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you? Let's see, I was 47, and my ex was in Vegas so I was here by myself, and he completely forgot my birthday the entire day until he got off the plane at 5 minutes til midnight and texted me as I was driving to the airport to get him and said "Oh hey, Happy Birthday by the way". Yeah, thanks for remembering right as it's over. This was just the start of how far downhill we rapidly slid in 2008.

~ What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying? Honestly, there are so many things. But they all start with ME, and until I get busy working on myself and building the satisfying life that I want and deserve, then here's where I'll be...stagnant and wishing my life was more satisfying.

~ What political issue stirred you the most? I found it amazing that America was able to get it's collective head out of it's ass and make Obama the President of the US... VERY VERY VERY exciting. (This was basically Simi's answer, I just agree and felt no need to change it!!!!)

~ Who did you miss? I miss my sister all the time. So many things I want to share with her. I want her to see Jordan and be as proud as I am. Life is just not the same without her.

~ Who was the best new person you met? My blogging buddies! I haven't "met" any of you yet, but this year I'm going to do everything I can to make that happen. Deb, Jill, Georgie, Vinnie, Darlene (Travel Girl), just to name a few. I feel like we've been buds forever. And Kathy, who I've "known" for a good 10 years now...I will be in Chicago at some point this year and you and me are hookin up, sister.

~ Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2008. Happiness comes from within me, and another person isn't going to make me happy. But, I'm not looking for a good time. I'm looking for someone to share good times with.

~ What sums up this year? (a word, a quote...?) Meets, but does not exceed expectations!

Monday, December 29, 2008

Get the tissues out. Seriously.

So, for the first time ever, my son commented on one of my blog posts! Aptly enough, it was the one about his birthday....

And since it made me cry (I'm such a mom!) I thought I'd make you all cry as well!

Here you go...

A Son's Response.

I just wanted to thank you for everything you have done for me over the past 18 years. You have always been there for me and done not just what was right but what was best for me. There is truly nothing i could ever do to repay you. I figured writing this would be a good start. I want to say sorry for any hardships i might have put you through. Its not that you weren't a good mother, I was just being stupid. But isn't that was the teenage years are for? Next i want to tell you how proud i really am that after all the shit life has thrown your way you have always come out strong. Even though i got my dads look and attitude i sure hope that i have the power to overcome things the way you have. You are without a doubt the strongest person that i know. I know that if Linda and Pappy where still here they would agree with me. You make me so proud to be able to call you my mother. I hope that you can look back in 20 or 30 years and realize how great of a mother you were. Because i know that when i look back on everything, i can see that i was truly blessed to have a mother like you.

I love you every much,


Thanks, buddy. I love you too.

Now, if I can just get him to capitalize his "i's", my job will be complete.

Saturday, December 27, 2008

18 years 9:07am...

I went from this:

To this:

In just a matter of minutes, my life changed drastically.

And in what seems like an equally short time, that little 9 lb bundle of joy has become this:

Where did all that time go? How is it possible that my baby is a grown man?

I was going to try to write a blog post today addressed to my know, a letter to my child on his 18th birthday. But I started crying just thinking about it, so I figured I'd better not try it!

I don't need to tell you how proud I am of him. How much joy he brings to me. Every day that I have been blessed to be his mom has been the best day of my life, and I pray every single night that we get to live a long and happy life together. (Although not necessarily in the same house. LOL!)

I didn't exactly know what I was doing on that day in 1990. I was 29, and had obviously never had a baby 24 hours a day, 7 days a week before! But I guess I figured it out, because he has survived having me raise him! And he's an amazing young man, and someone I am devastatingly proud to call my son.

He was so funny last night, he went to a movie with his girlfriend and his best friend, and it got out a little after midnight, so Jordan figured he was officially 18 at that time, so they stopped at the gas station so he could buy cigars for him and his friend to smoke in the hot tub today! He goes up to the counter to pay for them, has his ID out and everything...and they don't even card him. He was so bummed!

I got him two videos that he wanted, and of course his impending tattoo, and am taking him and Steph out to Japanese Steak House for dinner. Not sure what else he has planned for his big day, but I'm sure it will be a good one for him. Do me a favor, if you have a second today, drop Jordan an email at and wish him a happy 18th birthday, will you?

And my son....

I love you, bug. Thank you for being the best kid any mom could ever have. You are my love, and my life, and someday, I hope you have a child who brings you as much joy as you've given me.

Love, Mums.

Friday, December 26, 2008

Christmas photo fun with the Mac Book

Jordan got a new Mac Book for Christmas from the best Mom ever Santa, and we had fun using the photo thing to take pictures.

So here is Jordan and me Christmas morning, shortly after he opened his present. Yes, this is how frightening stunning I am first thing when I wake up. It's obvious, I've brought sexy back, especially with bed head and my glasses on.

(Note to self: Do not use that in personal ads if you want to actually ever meet a guy.)

So later in the evening, when the family was together I started making everyone get into the act...ok well I demonstrated how to do it first, of course. Clearly, I have Warhol issues:

Then my little mama got into the picture with me. My mom is 84 years old, and she was fascinated by the idea she could look at the screen and there was a camera built into there somewhere!!!

And then my two sisters joined the fun. I'm not drunk, I'm just going for the sexy, half opened eyes look. Riiiiiiight.

And then my niece Maggie and her boyfriend Brady jumped in:

Then Maggie and I had more fun with Warhol:

And last but not least, Mom & I went for the cartoon shot:

See, this is why I don't have a Mac Book. I'd sit around taking pictures all day. Yeah, I'm that vain bored. LOL

Thursday, December 25, 2008

Merry Christmas, my friends.

I wish for you a joyous, delightful Christmas today. Thank you for being part of my world and making my life a whole lot brighter.

And now, I give you my favorite Christmas song, O Holy Night, as sung by Il Divo. I have a complete crush on the voice of Carlos Marin (who's the Spanish, Ricky Ricardo looking singer in this group!)....his baritone moves me in ways I cannot even tell you. He puts the other singers to shame. So listen carefully, and you will hear his remarkable voice (especially around the 3:49 second mark of this video, he hits a high note that makes my eyes glaze over!!!).

Merry Christmas, everyone.

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Awwww, look what Crystal found!

Many thanks to Crystal (TropicalDreams) for this picture:

I love that you remembered my sister and her story, and sent it to me. It made my day, and I know somewhere Linda is laughing out loud at this right along with me.

Thanks again, doll. Merry Christmas!

Tis the season to be Julie....

Not a lot to write about, or time to do so, until after the holidays.

So I'm just going to post stuff that makes me laugh....

Here you go!

Monday, December 22, 2008

Who wants a present?

This is why we don't let men design gift wrap.

Sunday, December 21, 2008

Weekend Update

Live, from Columbus Ohio, it's Sunday Night!

Wow, I couldn't let two whole days go by without a blog. Thanks to those who checked up on me to make sure I was okay! LOL

Busy weekend....Christmas party for work on Friday night, lots of fun. Went to my Mom's Christmas party at the nursing home yesterday, she got a nice gift from Santa and I'll post a picture later. Spent the afternoon decorating iced sugar cookies with my sister and niece, and had a quiet evening at home. Today just basically did my Xmas shopping (yeah, I always wait til the last minute, I did NOT get the female shopping gene at all. I avoid malls like the plague!) and saw the movie "Seven Pounds". It was...different. Haven't decided if I liked it or not!

Got myself a new Coach purse with part of my Christmas bonus! Yes Danica, I will post a picture of that tomorrow as well!

Oh, and Saturday I got a surprise in the mail from a dear friend. Have I mentioned how much I love surprises? Especially those that brighten up what has been a really tough time of year for me since my sister died. Thanks for being my "stand in sister"...and lots of love right back at ya, baby.

And now, it's 9 degrees here in wonderful Ohio so I'm curled up in my sweats, on the couch with the furnace cranked and a cup of hot cocoa with carmel and chocolate vodkas trying to catch up on episodes of The Starter Wife.

How's your weekend been?

Friday, December 19, 2008

A Christmas story I'd like you to know.

I have a special Christmas story I want to share with you guys.

First, a little background...

This time five years ago, my sister Linda was in the hospital fighting for her life. She had a massive stroke on December 15th and needless to say, our holiday that year was spent basically living at the hospital. In fact, my Dad had a minor stroke three days after Linda's so for awhile we had them both in the same hospital, on different floors. Yes, it was awful.

Anyway, several years before this, Linda was out Christmas shopping, and she encountered what she deemed The Cutest Paper Towels Ever. They were Bounty's holiday ones that said "HO HO HO" on them. She, like any good Christmas decorating woman would do, grabbed herself a roll.

So she gets home, and excitedly starts telling her husband Jan how she found these darling "HO HO HO" paper towels, and proceeds to take them out of the bag to show him.

A puzzled look comes over her face as she showed them to him because lo and behold, the paper towels said...


She looked at them, looked at her husband, looked back at them and said "I swear, in the store these said "HO HO HO" on them!".

She was completely mystified as to how she ended up with a roll that clearly had a misprint on them.

Meanwhile, Jan is looking at her like she's lost her mind. You have to understand, my sister was a teacher, and one of the smartest people I know. Her husband was a teacher as well, so here we have two brainiacs looking at each completely baffled and the other thinking the baffled one has some serious blonde roots showing!

Linda says..."I'm driving right back over to that store and exchanging these for the ones that say "HO HO HO".

Finally, Jan quietly says....

"Linda....turn them over".

It was the funniest thing ever.

So of course that story got out, and from that day forward, everyone bought Linda Christmas things that had HO HO HO on them...and then would proceed to go around her house turning them all upside down. There was never an item in their home that didn't say OH OH OH by the time Christmas came.

Just days before her stroke, Jan had found a lighted HO HO HO to put outside on the front of their house. He was always big on decorating outside...lots of lights and stuff, so this was a perfect addition to his Christmas reportoire. He hung it up the right way, and Linda dared anyone to turn it upside down, including her husband.

So, there we were, in the hospital on Christmas Day, gathered around her bed, and she was finally awake for basically the first time in the ten days since she'd had her stroke. She was, of course, on a ventilator so she couldn't speak, but she could hear us, and understand what we were saying.

I stood there talking with her, and as a joke I said "Hey Lin, guess what? I was over at your house last night, and somebody turned the new HO HO HO that is outside on the house, upside down!"

Let me tell you something, that woman may not have been able to speak, but the dirty look she shot her husband at that moment spoke volumes. We all laughed for the first time in ten days.

We lost her on February 18th. She had just finally gotten off the vent and was able to talk to us, and the next day something happened that we don't know what it was, whether it was another stroke or a clot from where the vent had been dislodged and travelled to her brain, but suddenly she was gone. We were, and still are, devastated.

I have some of her HO HO HO things at home, and every year I try to carry on her tradition and buy something new to add to her collection. And every year, my son walks around my house and turns them all upside down. And we smile, and laugh, and remember the look on Linda's face when she would tell the paper towel story, and laugh at herself for her "blonde moment".

So this one's for you, sis. I love and miss you every day, all year...but at Christmas I miss your beautiful smile and laugh the most.

Thursday, December 18, 2008

Happy Birthday, Georgie!

Please go wish Georgie a happy birthday.

I hope she gets a birthday spanking present she'll remember for years to come!!!!