Wednesday, April 30, 2008

Waterfree at last!

The bloat is gone, and so is 3 of the 4 lbs. Woohoo! I knew that's all that was wrong but I needed to see it on the scale for myself.

Today is my co-worker Amanda's 27th birthday. My boss and I got her a Coach purse because she's never had a designer bag and she always moons over mine. So now she's got one of her own. Happy birthday, sweetie!

Have you heard about the story of the man who imprisoned his daughter for 24 years, had numerous children with her, and has just now been found out? I don't understand how this can happen. I don't know how you'd hide someone for 6 months, let alone 24 years, without anybody finding out? The daughter had children with him as a result of continuous rapes, and I guess I can't pretend to understand the mental stress or brainwashing that must have gone on all those years. But couldn't the daughter and one of the kids (some of which are like 19 and 17 years old now if not older) overpowered the 70 year old man at some point and gotten free? Wasn't there ever a time in 24 years that the daughter *had* to have medical care, especially after giving birth to something like 8 children? How did he manage to feed and clothe that many people for so long with NOBODY knowing?

I just don't understand. I pray for the daughter and all of those children, that they will somehow, someday, find their way out of the darkness that their lives have been. I fear it will take years, many many years, if it ever happens at all.

What is wrong with people? I just don't get it.

Tuesday, April 29, 2008

Recovering....slowly

Yawn. I'm still tired from the trip! But I got about 11 hours of sleep last night so I'm starting to get caught up. At least I'm awake at work today without needing a coffee IV.

The trip was fun. Did the usual touristy things in Vegas. Walked in and out of a lot of casinos. Saw the new Palazzo, which is the Venetian part two. It was gorgeous. Would have stayed there except didn't feel like spending $300 a night to shower in a marble bathroom! Been there, done that, and it doesn't make the trip any more special. Intended to take in a couple of shows and then ended up doing other things. The weather was fabulous, I got sun on my face and arms, but clearly I ate too much as I gained back 4 lbs!!!!!!!!!!!!! F*CK!!!!!!!!!! Oh well, it's not all "fat" as I don't think it's possible to gain that much that fast! I would guess there is some water retention involved with flying, and being in the desert sun. Had nothing to do with free drinks while gambling.

At least that's my story and I'm sticking to it.

So I'm back in rainy, cold Ohio and back to recording my food intake on the Daily Plate. Wish me luck.

This weekend, Saturday, is Prom, so I'll have pictures of my baby and his girl to post. Can't wait, I know they will look great!!!!!!!!!! And on Sunday, my dear friend Penny is celebrating her birthday, and is aging gracefully from 59 to...50-10. LOL...she's gonna kick my ass for putting that on a world wide website!!!! Haven't seen her since last August I believe, so I'm looking forward to that too.

Work has finally slowed down enough that I can breathe, and I haven't work a weekend in a month which is great. AND, I got a big raise last week (huge, actually!) so that certainly helps from a financial standpoint...and it's nice to know that all of my hard work has been recognized.

Now, if I can just get my romantic life in order...I'll be in good shape!

Monday, April 28, 2008

What happens in Vegas....stays in Vegas.

Just got home at 7am, got bumped off our flight yesterday and onto the red eye last night, so needless to say I'm 99% asleep at work right now. But got a free ticket anywhere in the 48 states AND a free upgrade to first class on the flight which was nice. So all in all, worth it.

I'll be back later with details...well, at least the ones I'm willing to divulge in a public forum!!!!

Thursday, April 24, 2008

It's my Friday! Woohoo!

And I'm heading to hot, sunny Vegas tonight! Double woooooooohoooooooooo!

I'll be back Sunday night late, so I won't be blogging between now and then. I'll be busy winning money (I'm optimistic), drinking $.99 frozen margaritas (I'm 100% sure), and seeing my friend Ashlee who I haven't seen in a year!!!!

See you all Monday....

Monday, April 21, 2008

I loved this.

:::climbing up on my political soapbox::::

My favorite part of all is in bold and italics near the end. (I did that to make it stand out...it wasn't quoted that way)


"My Vote's for Obama (if I could vote) …by Michael Moore

Friends,

I don't get to vote for President this primary season. I live in Michigan. The party leaders (both here and in D.C.) couldn't get their act together, and thus our votes will not be counted.

So, if you live in Pennsylvania, can you do me a favor? Will you please cast my vote — and yours — on Tuesday for Senator Barack Obama?

I haven't spoken publicly ’til now as to who I would vote for, primarily for two reasons: 1) Who cares?; and 2) I (and most people I know) don't give a rat's ass whose name is on the ballot in November, as long as there's a picture of JFK and FDR riding a donkey at the top of the ballot, and the word "Democratic" next to the candidate's name.

Seriously, I know so many people who don't care if the name under the Big "D" is Dancer, Prancer, Clinton or Blitzen. It can be Mickey Mouse, Donald Duck, Barry Obama or the Dalai Lama.

Well, that sounded good last year, but over the past two months, the actions and words of Hillary Clinton have gone from being merely disappointing to downright disgusting. I guess the debate last week was the final straw. I've watched Senator Clinton and her husband play this game of appealing to the worst side of white people, but last Wednesday, when she hurled the name "Farrakhan" out of nowhere, well that's when the silly season came to an early end for me. She said the "F" word to scare white people, pure and simple. Of course, Obama has no connection to Farrakhan. But, according to Senator Clinton, Obama's pastor does — AND the "church bulletin" once included a Los Angeles Times op-ed from some guy with Hamas! No, not the church bulletin!

This sleazy attempt to smear Obama was brilliantly explained the following night by Stephen Colbert. He pointed out that if Obama is supported by Ted Kennedy, who is Catholic, and the Catholic Church is led by a Pope who was in the Hitler Youth, that can mean only one thing: OBAMA LOVES HITLER!

Yes, Senator Clinton, that's how you sounded. Like you were nuts. Like you were a bigot stoking the fires of stupidity. How sad that I would ever have to write those words about you. You have devoted your life to good causes and good deeds. And now to throw it all away for an office you can't win unless you smear the black man so much that the superdelegates cry "Uncle (Tom)" and give it all to you.

But that can't happen. You cast your die when you voted to start this bloody war. When you did that you were like Moses who lost it for a moment and, because of that, was prohibited from entering the Promised Land.

How sad for a country that wanted to see the first woman elected to the White House. That day will come — but it won't be you. We'll have to wait for the current Democratic governor of Kansas to run in 2016 (you read it here first!).

There are those who say Obama isn't ready, or he's voted wrong on this or that. But that's looking at the trees and not the forest. What we are witnessing is not just a candidate but a profound, massive public movement for change. My endorsement is more for Obama The Movement than it is for Obama the candidate.

That is not to take anything away from this exceptional man. But what's going on is bigger than him at this point, and that's a good thing for the country. Because, when he wins in November, that Obama Movement is going to have to stay alert and active. Corporate America is not going to give up their hold on our government just because we say so. President Obama is going to need a nation of millions to stand behind him.

I know some of you will say, 'Mike, what have the Democrats done to deserve our vote?' That's a damn good question. In November of '06, the country loudly sent a message that we wanted the war to end. Yet the Democrats have done nothing. So why should we be so eager to line up happily behind them?

I'll tell you why. Because I can't stand one more friggin' minute of this administration and the permanent, irreversible damage it has done to our people and to this world. I'm almost at the point where I don't care if the Democrats don't have a backbone or a kneebone or a thought in their dizzy little heads. Just as long as their name ain't "Bush" and the word "Republican" is not beside theirs on the ballot, then that's good enough for me.

I, like the majority of Americans, have been pummeled senseless for 8 long years. That's why I will join millions of citizens and stagger into the voting booth come November, like a boxer in the 12th round, all bloodied and bruised with one eye swollen shut, looking for the only thing that matters — that big "D" on the ballot.

Don't get me wrong. I lost my rose-colored glasses a long time ago.

It's foolish to see the Democrats as anything but a nicer version of a party that exists to do the bidding of the corporate elite in this country. Any endorsement of a Democrat must be done with this acknowledgement and a hope that one day we will have a party that'll represent the people first, and laws that allow that party an equal voice.

Finally, I want to say a word about the basic decency I have seen in Mr. Obama. Mrs. Clinton continues to throw the Rev. Wright up in his face as part of her mission to keep stoking the fears of White America. Every time she does this I shout at the TV, "Say it, Obama! Say that when she and her husband were having marital difficulties regarding Monica Lewinsky, who did she and Bill bring to the White House for 'spiritual counseling?' THE REVEREND JEREMIAH WRIGHT!"


But no, Obama won't throw that at her. It wouldn't be right. It wouldn't be decent. She's been through enough hurt. And so he remains silent and takes the mud she throws in his face.

That's why the crowds who come to see him are so large. That's why he'll take us down a more decent path. That's why I would vote for him if Michigan were allowed to have an election.

But the question I keep hearing is… 'can he win? Can he win in November?' In the distance we hear the siren of the death train called the Straight Talk Express. We know it's possible to hear the words "President McCain" on January 20th. We know there are still many Americans who will never vote for a black man. Hillary knows it, too. She's counting on it.

Pennsylvania, the state that gave birth to this great country, has a chance to set things right. It has not had a moment to shine like this since 1787 when our Constitution was written there. In that Constitution, they wrote that a black man or woman was only "three fifths" human. On Tuesday, the good people of Pennsylvania have a chance for redemption.

Yours,
Michael Moore"


Mr. Moore, I would happily tender a vote for Barack Obama in your honor, were I a resident of PA.

Monday, Monday

Thank you, Universe...for letting my son's car problems *only* be a bad starter, and not requiring me to spend $2,000 that I don't have to buy him a new vehicle. Even though he'd have to pay me back, somebody has to put out the money up front. So thanks to his father for doing the labor and getting it back on the road! I really appreciate it!!!!

Good weekend, saw a couple of movies...."88 Minutes" which was not too bad, and "Forgetting Sarah Marshall" which was a hoot.

Going to Vegas Thursday night for a long weekend. Woohoo! Can't wait!!!!!

Not much else to report. Oh yeah, getting my hair colored Wednesday, which is really great seeing how the grey has grown out at the temples and is showing. Bah...

Friday, April 18, 2008

Shock of all shocks.

My son cleaned his room last night.

No, really!

Not only did he clean it, he changed it all around, put all his movie posters up (he works for a movie theater and gets all of their posters that he wants), he even swept the floor!!!!!!!!

Who are you, and what have you done with Jordan?????????

It was a nice surprise. I'd been over at Easton and he was vegging on the couch when I left...not sure what happened but next thing I know, he's turned into the White Tornado.

No, I am not bitching. Trust me! Just still reeling from the shock!

No big weekend plans for me, other than cleaning my house. Still doing the Daily Plate every day, as you can see from my ticker below I've only lost 6.2 lbs. I guess that's not bad for 2 weeks but still...this past week has been VERY slow. But a loss is a loss right, and as long as the scale keeps going down, I'm doing something right.

Starting talking about boob jobs with some friends yesterday, and of course the difference between the hard, melon balls and the soft natural ones etc. I've seen great boob jobs and I've seen ones that scare me, and I can't imagine why a woman would want those on her chest for life. But I do understand the want/need for it.

If this were 20 years ago, I'd have it done in a heartbeat. It's a little late at this point in my life. Everything else is going south, the last thing I need are my boobs pointing north.

They can stay east and west right where they are now! LOL!

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

Blah. That's it. All I have to say.

I'm too freaking busy at work to blog. Clearly, that needs to change.

Back in a bit.

Oh, getting nails back on at 5pm! Woohoo! Of course I probably won't be able to type for awhile now that I've gotten used to not having them!!!!

Tuesday, April 15, 2008

Taxes suck.

I'm just sayin.

I realize we all have to pay them but it doesn't make me like them any better.

I've got nothing interesting to say today, frankly. I've got too much work to do, and not enough motivation to get it done. I'm hungry and bitchy and sleepy and cranky and pissy and annoyed and irritated. Evidently I'm my own Seven Dwarfs.

Last night I took my mother-in-law to a little event at the cancer clinic where they gave her a bunch of make-up and taught her how to draw eyebrows on again and stuff like that. She tried on some wigs and various hats. It was a really sweet time, and I'm glad I got to share it with her.

Oh, and I'm getting my nails put back on. This is bullshit. My hands look like hell and I can't pick anything up, can't open a freaking can of pop, can't scratch an itch, can't run conditioner through my hair without nails to separate the strands, and my fingertips hurt from 18 years of not being exposed and now suddenly being tortured by typing on a keyboard! I want my french manicure back.

Monday, April 14, 2008

Where have I been?

Good morning blog readers. I had a busy ass weekend and never managed to post! And I don't have time to right now because I'm busier than a one legged man in a kicking contest here at work.

But a noteworthy event happened today.

I forgot something about my divorce!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Now, you are probably wondering why that even remotely matters. Let me walk you through it. I'm one who remembers *everything*. Dates, times, places, songs that were playing, what I was wearing, the temperature outside when it happened, etc. I just don't forget things. Hell, Elizabeth actually calls me to inquire about her marriage and/or divorce dates because I can remember but she can't!

So when it came to my own divorce, and events that led up to it (ugly, ugly events), I have a mind like a steel trap. It's sort of like PTSD (post traumatic stress disorder), I remember things I don't even want to, but they are imbedded in my mind! I amaze and amuse (and frighten) my friends with my uncanny recall.

Anyway, so this morning as I was relaying some events of the weekend to my co-worker Amanda, I was explaining I went back to a place on Saturday night for the first time in three years since my marriage fell apart, and as I relayed it to her I could not remember the specific details about the actual event that occured back then, that made me never go back there. That shocked me beyond belief!

You have to understand...I didn't think those painful searing moments would ever leave me, because some of the things that happened hurt me to the core and they were the darkest moments of my life. So for me to have finally put the distance between myself and one of those horrible memories....it just makes me feel fabulous!

I'm healing! I really am! I'm actually going to get past all of that ugliness and it really won't affect me the rest of my life!!!!!!!!!!!!

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Dance party!!!!! Everyone on your feet!

I'll be back in a bit for more on the weekend, but I just had to fire off a quick post about this!

Friday, April 11, 2008

Oh, and....

I have a lot of weird dreams, and most of the time I remember them and can analyze them to the point of knowing why I would dream a particular thing.

However, last night I dreamed I was married to Danny Bonaduce.

No clue why I would dream that. I didn't see him on TV or anything last night before I went to bed. I don't have any deep seeded attraction to red haired, steriod fueled raging men with anger management issues and bad skin. And I was far more into David Cassidy during the Partridge Family years.

Yet, there was I was, Mrs. B last night. Fortunately I woke up before we consummated the marriage. LOL

Weird.

By the way, my boss just signed us all up for the Race for the Cure. I won't be racing, but I'll be walking my way towards the finish line! It's on May 17th and I'll be walking in my mother-in-law Jennie's honor. As some of you know she's dealing with four different types of cancer right now, one of them being breast.

It's a 3 mile walk. I just hope my back holds out!

Happy Friday!

TGIF, eh? It's been a long week, but a good one so I can't complain. And hopefully I won't have to work this weekend, although I really should come in for a bit.

Can you believe it, I forgot to weigh in this morning! But again it was another morning of putting on jeans that I didn't have to suck anything in to button. And they've stretched out so much this morning that I feel like a teenager walking around with my underwear exposed and baggy ass seat. Then I hike 'em up (which is such a classy action when one is wearing high heels) and off I go.

I feel like I'm shrinking, which is weird. This morning I noticed it when I put my robe on...there was more robe to wrap. Can that be possible on someone my size, after only 6 lbs gone forever? Maybe I'm just unbloating. I dunno...I'll take it regardless!

Got Marilu Henner's new book last night called "Wear Your Life Well". I think it's going to be really good. I haven't worn my life well in...well, 47 years! Anyone can look at me and know that the circles and bags under my eyes are from not eating right, as is the blotchy bloated face and the fat all over my body! My house is seriously dirty, my office is a mess...I don't seem to have control over any area of my life. The only clean areas around me are my purse and my car! (Two very expensive items I seem to take care of!)

I think it's true that your outer surroundings reflect your inner chaos. The past few years of my life have been very, very stressful and chaotic. Some of it I could have controlled, some of it has been completely out of my control. In a two year period I lost my job, went to work for my fiance', married him, my mother broke a hip, my sister had a massive stroke, my father had a small stroke three days later, we bought a house and I had to relocate my child in the middle of his 7th grade year, my sister passed away, my husband and child and I had to go to family counseling because we were having a very tough time living as a family, my father passed away, my mother broke another hip, my husband and I went for 4 months not collecting paychecks at work and having to spend all of our savings etc to survive, and the coup de grace was him having an affair and us getting a divorce, and me having to find not only a new job, but a new house, a new car, and relocate again. That was the final straw, my life was blown up around me and I really had to dig deep to find the strength to go on.

That's pretty much every major life stressor there is, that happened to me in a two year period of time. And we wonder why I'm not always playing with a full deck? haha

The point I was making is this...I've had a lot going on for a long time. It's been 2 1/2 years since my divorce and it's time to get my act together once and for all. Yes, a lot of shit happened that wasn't fair and I didn't deserve. But I also allowed myself to stay in a situation afterwards that wasn't healthy either. And my outside world still reflects that.

So I'm taking back my life, dammit. I have sat around and whined long enough about what I lost. It's time to start living again! I'm making the long needed changes in my life to make it something I'm proud of, that I want to share with someone, and that I can enjoy.

In the immortal words of Janet Jackson....

Got my own mind
I wanna make my own decisions
When it has to do with my life, my life
I wanna be the one in control


Hey, I could have quoted "Nasty Girl"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thursday, April 10, 2008

My taste buds, they are a changin'

Funny how when you stop eating a whole lotta junk...you stop craving a whole lotta junk.

And funny how good simple things taste. Mandarin oranges, for example. Mmmmm. That was like a little party in my mouth a few minutes ago.

I can't wait to hit my first 10 lb. mark. I'm thinking about buying myself something for every 10 I lose, but I don't know what that would be, because that would turn into a collection of sorts and I don't collect anything but damaged men evidently. LOL! Or maybe I should just do something nice for myself. Maybe a pedicure every time. Or a massage.

Any ideas?

Feeling good today!!!

I'm feeling damn good today! Down 6 lbs. and that makes me happy. Put on my jeans this morning and didn't have to suck anything in to get them buttoned. That makes me happy. Having a good hair day because it's finally grown back out enough to pull up in a clip...that makes me happy.

Sex would make me happy too but I don't see that happening today. ROFLMAO. Oh well, a girl can't expect *everything* overnnight, right? But it is a form of exercise. I'm just sayin. Wonder if there are trainers for that?

Anyway....

Yesterday I set myself free. Wanna know how? I told a select group of friends how much I weigh. It was embarrassing, and mortifying to reveal that number but as Dr. Phil says, you cannot change what you don't acknowledge.

So I acknowledged it in a big way. But it was on a groups list that only specific people belong to. I'm not quite ready to acknowledge it here!!!!!

I will say that I'm in new numbers today. For those of you who never went to WW at any point, what that means is that when you go from say, 120 to 119, you're in new numbers...the 10's versus the 20's. Which is totally where I am today, a scant 119.

I'm just a little bloated. LOL

Wednesday, April 9, 2008

Can we talk about The Biggest Loser?

OK, I have a love-hate relationship with this show.

On one hand, the transformations these men and women go through absolutely amaze me. I realize they have to work extremely hard to get the kind of results they do.

But how realistic is that? Come on, you aren't losing 144 lbs in 15 weeks by working out an hour a day! That's just shy of 10 lbs a week one guy lost! One of the girls in the finale, Ali, has lost 99 lbs....6.6 lbs a week. I don't know about anyone else, but I sure have never lost that kind of weight!

So how many hours a day are they working out? 8? 10? And how many calories are they eating? 3?

I dunno...it's motivational to see that kind of life changing action but I think it's also sending a wrong message, because normal people cannot change their lives that quickly, in that dramatic of a fashion. It cannot be healthy to lose that kind of weight so fast. How many of them actually keep it off do you think?

That being said, I can really identify with Ali. I'm not sure how tall she is, but our body sizes aren't much different. (OK yes, clearly hers is NOW. But when she started on the Biggest Loser, I could identify with her!) She looks fabulous right now, and I'd love to see her win. I think I'll put a picture of her on my iPhone so everytime I use it, I get motivated to look that damn good!

In other news...

We got Jordan's tux this weekend for the prom. His "friend" (I'm not allowed to call her anything else, even though I think there is definitely more to it!) Stephanie has a beautiful yellow dress, so his tux is black with a yellow vest and tie.

Here's the dress:



Here's a close up of the top of the dress....



Here's what Jordan's tux will look like:



And last but not least...here are the two likebirds. LOL



I'm excited about Prom. I didn't go to either of mine, so I'll live vicariously through Jordan going to his!

On a sad note, yesterday one of Stephanie's good friends was killed in a car wreck, and she was a mess last night. Jordan immediately went to her house when she found out and spent the evening with her. He was very upset when he came home. Please join me in saying a prayer for the family of her friend and ask for strength in their time of loss.

And then go hug your kids if you have any. We're so blessed, aren't we?

Tuesday, April 8, 2008

OK more on The Daily Plate

I gotta tell you, this might be the best thing I ever did for myself. I've never really paid that close of attention to what I was shoving in my mouth. (Unless it was connected to a man) OMG! That totally did not come out the way I meant it! ROFLMAO...what I meant was I always pay attention to what I order when out on dates, etc.

Oh hell, why am I trying to explain myself? Freud would have a field day with what I said, regardless.

ANYWAY....

Having to account for every bite I eat is really eye opening. Not only from a caloric standpoint, but seeing the breakdown of how much fat I'm eating, how much cholesterol, sugar, etc. It's really sort of mindblowing. And it's making me pay attention to my food choices....and determine what's worth eating! Sure, maybe I'm really craving something sweet, but is a 120 calorie piece of dark chocolate (aka black sugar...LOL) worth it when I could just have a cup of grapes for half the calories and only consume natural sugar that's better for my body??

The really great thing about TDP is that I can access it from my phone, so no matter where I am, I can check the nutritional value of what I'm eating and make an informed decision, rather than eat something and then later find out it had like 3,000 calories in it!

I've got my mojo on, folks. It only took 47 years.

By the way, did NOT have new nails put back on. And yes, my hands feel weird. My nails are very thin and peeling but I do have polish on them (short as they are!) and am going to try to let them breathe for a bit. They can breathe through the polish....right?

So I'm slacking already?

Not even a week with a blog and already I can't keep up? Geesh.

Just read my new favorite line:

When happiness becomes the priority, progress takes care of itself.


Words to live by. I'm doing really well counting calories. I'm down 4 lbs and feeling good! Got an hour walk in yesterday in the beautiful weather, and my motivation is at an all time high.

According to the Daily Plate, I should be at my goal weight on December 1st. Once I get to that goal, I'll re-evaluate and see how much more I want to lose. I may be quite happy there, so we'll see....

Sunday, April 6, 2008

Beautiful day in Ohio

Sunny and warm, gotta love it.

Unfortunately I spent a good chunk of it indoors, in the basement of my boss' parent's house installing a computer.

Sigh.

Did go get Jordan's tux ordered for the prom, and we went to Best Buy for bluetooth headsets for our iPhones.

And that's about how exciting my day has been.

Calm down, people. You'll burst a blood vessel. LOL

Saturday, April 5, 2008

I'm sleepy....(yawn).....

Went to see Carrie Underwood last night. It was a good concert, albeit about an hour too long. She's not a big enough star (aka hasn't had enough hits) to fill a two hour concert. I think she sang every song on both of her albums, which got a little boring to hear 20 songs you don't know....and at the end her "encore" was November Rain and Paradise City, by Guns & Roses (yeah, figure that one out!) and finally Before He Cheats. To her credit though, she rocked the G&R stuff. I was quite surprised!

Prior to the concert we went to Eddie George's Grille for dinner, and I had two vodka and SF Red Bull's. In retrospect....bad idea! Got home at 10:30, stayed up til 12:30, finally went to bed and could not fall asleep until 2:30, and then was woken up twice getting cramps in my feet, and finally was up for good at 5:45 this morning. Ugh. Note to self, in the future, skip the Red Bull and just drink the vodka!!!!

So now I'm tired. Oh, and I should mention that in the two hours between when I got home and when I went to bed....I methodically removed every one of my fake nails. They had been breaking on the sides and stuff for several days, I think this set is just so old and brittle...so I just took them all off! It's the first time in probably 18 years that I haven't had fake nails. I don't really care for it! And it's hard to type! The ends of my fingers are sore! So I do have a nail appointment today (which is why I was fine with taking them all off last night) Now, ironically, I am considering asking if she can just put a very thin "stabilizing" coat on my natural nails to allow them to grow out. They are so weak and flimsy and it's going to take months but I may just be nail free for the first time in almost 20 years.

What the hell is wrong with me? No nails? Monitoring my eating? Trying to get healthy? EXERCISING? (Yes, I did 20 minutes on recumbant bike this morning!) Who am I and what have they done with Julie??????

In other news....

I'm going to see my mother-in-law today. After her second round of chemo, she started losing her hair (as we knew would happen) so I bought her a couple of hats to wear from this website I found online.

Oh, and yesterday, even with eating dinner out (I had a Seared Ahi Tuna salad) and the vodka's...I still came in with 256 calores to spare on The Daily Plate! Woohoo! And I'm down 3 lbs since I started it! Again, I'm aware it's fluctuations in water weight...you don't lose 3 lbs of "fat" in 3 days. But it's just nice to see the scale going down for a change. I set my first goal of losing 70 lbs (there is a tracker at the bottom of the blog now!) and that will get me to where I feel good, look good, am comfortably a size 12, and I can live with that. Believe it or not, I will still be at the highest end of the "ideal weight" for someone my height, age and skeletal size!!!!! The low end of that range is a number I have never seen in my life except when I was maybe 13. I passed it and never saw it again! I don't think my body could get there, to be honest. Years and years ago, when I was 21, I lost 60 lbs in 3 months (can you say....Black Beauties???) and I was very small for me, a size 9, I had no boobs, wore small or medium shirts...and my face came down to a point at my chin. My mother was convinced I was anorexic (no Mom, I'm just doing speed. LOL) (Hey, it was the early 80's, I did a lot of things I'm not proud of!) Even at that size (and believe me, I was little, just ask anyone who remembers those days), I still was not at the low end of my "ideal" weight! I at least carry my weight well. If I told you the number I am right now, I think you'd be shocked. At least I hope you would!

OK, off to shower and get ready for the day. It's going to be beautiful out, I think I might go take a long walk this afternoon.

WHO SAID THAT?????

Friday, April 4, 2008

By the way, guess what I'm doing tonight?

Going to see Carrie Underwood! Woohoo!

You know that when she sings "Before He Cheats", I'll be standing in my chair dancing. Lucky for me, that song came out about a year too late, because had it been out in 2005 rather than 2006, I'd probably have ended up in jail, after being far too inspired to dig my keys into the side of his pretty little souped up four wheel drive, and carve my name into his leather seats. I'd have taken a Louisville Slugger to both headlights, and slashed a hole in all four tires.

And maybe next time he'd think before he cheats.

Happy Friday....let's talk about The Daily Plate!

Ah, another lovely rainy day in Central Ohio. Gotta love spring in the Buckeye State, eh?

So yesterday my friend Sue turned me on to a nifty little website called The Daily Plate, which is a great way to track what you eat! Remember "if you bite it, write it"? Well, I wrote it all yesterday. The only reason I'm NOT shocked is because I had already logged into TDP so I knew how many calories I could have and modified what I shoved into my mouth accordingly. Had it just been a normal day and I was randomly eating all over the place, I'd have probably been mortified. And eaten more to shove down the embarrassment.

The Daily Plate tells me that for my height (5'8"...I actually measured, and have lost 1" in height over the years. Guess that's what 3 degenerated disks will do for a girl!) and my weight (you didn't really think I was going to post that for all the world to see, did you???) and because I want to lose 2 lbs a week, I need to be eating no more than 1,761 calories per day. If you think about it, that's not restrictive by any means. I could eat 6 Healthy Choice meals in a day on that! haha Or if I went the liquid diet route, I could have 5.45 Margaritas a day. Now we're on to something.

While you can certainly eat "whatever you want", I will at least say that I have learned enough from Dr Steward (LOL) to know that fruits, veggies, legumes, etc are the way to go. So I'm bringing food from home, and doing this the right way for a change....yes folks, the old dog (waves hand!) will eventually put the new tricks to good use.

So as I said, I tracked all that I ate yesterday and at the end of the day I still had 161 calories left . Sweet! I could have had a glass of wine last night! Dammit, now is not a good time for that thought to dawn on me.

Now I need to figure out how to put a tracker on my blog so I can track weight loss. This morning I was 1.4 lbs less than yesterday. Yea me! I must have peed a lot last night. LOL

Oh, and it bears noting that I haven't had a cigarette in a week or so now. Turns out, when I don't drink, I don't even want to smoke! Who knew?

Thursday, April 3, 2008

A little clarification is in order.

In describing my divorce, I may have mislead you into thinking I was still involved with my ex.

I'm not. Not romantically at least.

We're friends. Or maybe frenemies. Not sure. Keep your friends close and your enemies closer, right? I dunno.

His mom has been very sick and I am still extremely close to her, and therefore he and I are uniting for a common good....taking care of her.

He and I still have some unreconciled ties that bind...and until those are rectified we are still going to see each other, talk, and occasionally spend time together. It's just what it is.

I don't hate him. On the contrary, believe it or not I still love him. It just took me a long time to realize and accept that "happily ever after" just wasn't meant to be for us. We had problems in our marriage that long superceded the disaster at the end, and I have culpability in those issues...I'm not blameless. But I will forever stand by my statement that I didn't deserve the hell I was put through on his way out the door. If he was so freaking miserable in our marriage, he should have gotten the hell out way before he started dating again!

Anyway...I'm a single gal now, and at some point soon I hope to be 50% of a couple, because it's getting a little lonely spending my weekend nights home alone with BOB.

Figure it out. LOL

Real Estate is going well, though!

In other news....

My real estate business is picking up! I have a house in contract (yea Melissa!), have one listed, and another one ready to list soon, and a pre-approved buyer who just needs to make time to start looking.

I enjoy real estate. Not that I don't like my regular day job, but it's fun doing something different. I've been in accounting for the last 75 years or something, which sucks for a girl who never ever balanced her own checkbook. So at least now I'm doing something I enjoy, and am not just collecting a paycheck for.

So remember if you have something to sell, or want to buy...I'm your girl. Ain't nothing better than spending other people's money. LOL

Please read the CF Husband blog

CF Husband is one of the best blogs ever. It's about a young couple...he's a pastor, she's a beautiful young woman with Cystic Fibrosis, and they had the sweetest little baby very prematurely. Tricia just received a double lung transplant late last night/early this morning, and I would like everyone to join me in saying a prayer for her, that she doesn't reject the new lungs, and will have many, many years ahead of her, raising that adorable little girl and loving her amazing husband.

The power of prayer is astounding. I've seen it through their blog, trust me.

So here I am....47.

Wow.

Why is it that I feel 37 mentally and 57 physically? Gee, maybe because I'm overweight, out of shape, still smoking on occasion, and refusing to set foot anywhere near a gym? Let's face it, if I'm going to be sweating and breathing hard, there better be nudity involved. I'm just sayin.

So I decided to start blogging. Jump on the wagon, so to speak. (Hey, that would qualify as exercise, right?) I was told today that I should start recording everything I eat..."if you bite it, write it". That way you are more cognizant of your food behaviors.

Food behaviors? I eat anything that doesn't move. How's that for a food behavior?

OK so back to the purpose of this blog. I just turned 47 a few weeks ago. Clearly, I'm not getting any younger. So if I plan on taking one last run at being "all that" (ok so I've never actually been "all that", but I'd like to, at least once before I die, hear someone say "You're too skinny!" without any sort of medical intervention being involved!)...anyway, I need to get that last run started.

The thing is, I *know* better. My best friend is a naturopathic doctor, for heaven's sake! She has tried for years to get me on the right track (not to mention, to save my life) and I've fought her every step of the way. Whining at the top of my lungs..."It's too "hard" to eat healthy and organic and natural. I don't "like" to exercise. Yes, I "know" I have no business eating meat or any other animal products with my history of colitis, and family history of colon cancer." I can lecture other people until the cows come home about the bad effects of dairy on your body! (pun intended) So it's not like I'm stupid, or clueless, and have gotten to this point in life by accident. My body is what it is because of my own negligence. Period. I got nobody to blame but me.

So I figured accountability is a good place to start. I don't know if anyone will ever read this, so I'm not sure who I'm being accountable to or what I'm really even accounting for. Am I going to post what I eat every day? Maybe. That should be good for a laugh. Am I going to post how lazy I am and how much time I log being hortizontal rather than vertical? Possibly.

I'm just starting slowly at the exercise thing. If I type enough, I should have really skinny fingers, right?