56 days til the wedding. Holy shitballs. I'm so not ready.
Second, I just wanted to post this little item I found today, a quote from the great Meryl Streep. As I have entered my 50's (53 now, thank you), this is exactly where I am in my life.
“I no longer have patience for certain things, not because I’ve become arrogant, but simply because I reached a point in my life where I do not want to waste more time with what displeases me or hurts me. I have no patience for cynicism, excessive criticism and demands of any nature. I lost the will to please those who do not like me, to love those who do not love me and to smile at those who do not want to smile at me. I no longer spend a single minute on those who lie or want to manipulate. I decided not to coexist anymore with pretense, hypocrisy, dishonesty and cheap praise. I do not tolerate selective erudition nor academic arrogance. I do not adjust either to popular gossiping. I hate conflict and comparisons. I believe in a world of opposites and that’s why I avoid people with rigid and inflexible personalities. In friendship I dislike the lack of loyalty and betrayal. I do not get along with those who do not know how to give a compliment or a word of encouragement. Exaggerations bore me and I have difficulty accepting those who do not like animals. And on top of everything I have no patience for anyone who does not deserve my patience.” _ Meryl Streep
Happy Friday, all! Likely won't be back until after the wedding, so Happy Fall!
I haven't done a blog post since last October when we brought our delicious baby Tolinka home to live with us. She's spoiled beyond belief, and loved without excepetion. She's a momma's girl big time, but she loves her daddy too. To say we treat her as our baby is an understatement. She and Mora (my granddog as you remember) are best friends, and love to play together.
So the wedding is officially 141 days away. How did that happen?? When I started that count to the right, there were 500+ days! Everything is set, all the plans in motion. Now it's just a waiting game, really. We're having a Hallowedding...getting married on 10/31 at what will be a big ass costume party with vows! Michael and I are dressing as a Steampunk Bride & Groom, and my dress will be purple.
While I doubt I have many readers left, know that I think of you all often, and am grateful for the friends I made as a blogger. (Some of which are coming to the wedding!!!) I'll be back in November with a recap of the wedding!
Michael is having a kidney transplant on Friday. I know I haven't posted much recently, but please do me a favor and say a prayer for him, and for his donor and niece, Kitty....for a successful transplant, and easy recovery for both.
Michael had his 3rd fistula surgery Wednesday. For those of you not well versed in dialysis and all that stuff, a fistula is where they graft a vein and an artery together in your arm, to be used as a dialysis port. He's had this surgery done twice before in the last month, and neither took. Both times the graft clotted within 12 hours of surgery.
This time, however, the brilliant vascular surgeon figured out that all these years of Michael donating blood to the Red Cross had created scar tissue in his veins, and thus wasn't allowing the first two fistulas adequate blood flow. This guy moved the fistula to a different area, used a better artery/vein combo and voila....we feel the thrill (the vibration you literally feel under the skin of his arm, feels like rushing water) and we can hear the bruit (the sound it makes in the arm) through a stethoscope.
Yes, I have a stethoscope. Yes, should be scared. No, you cannot borrow it for "dress up night".
Nurse Ratched, at your service.
So yeah, finally we have a working fistula. I can't tell you how excited that makes us. Of course, getting there was fun....
Michael had to start dialysis in a hurry (a fistula takes 6-8 weeks to mature for use) so he had a chest cath put in. That kind of sucks to have two tubes hanging out of your chest. So here's that:
Then he went out and shaved his head like he's in the Army got a hair cut:
You can imagine my surprise. I'm getting used to it though. And one of my gay friends pronounced him as "hot" with the haircut, so clearly it's a hit in that circle. LOL Besides, now he and Jordan look like father and son...well, if Michael would grow a handlebar mustache.
That's my and my favorite kid on Mother's Day. I'm still trying to figure out exactly when he got taller than me?
Anyway, back to the Kidney Khronicles:
So this week, we went to get the third fistula, and Michael was pretty bored with the entire process.
But afterwards, he felt pretty good, and we were happy to go home.
So right now we're just waiting for a bunch of us to get testing started a donor matches. God willing there is a transplant in Michael's near future.
If you're O blood type and wanna save a life, call me. Email me. Fax me. Text. Instagram. Facebook. Smoke signals. Whatev.
Oh, and there is no blogging without a picture of my granddog....
Mora turned a year old on April 28th. And I love her to pieces. And believe me, she is Grandma's Girl.
Thank you, to everyone who responded to my post about Michael's need for a kidney transplant, for all of your kind words, prayers, good thoughts and most of all for sharing our story.
I also tweeted it and Facebooked about it, and as a result of all of all of our efforts, I've had several friends of mine who have called the transplant center for packets, one of Jordan's friends who is very willing to be tested and donate, and believe it or not a total stranger from Canada who contacted me to let me know he had called and gotten a packet sent to him as well.
Today I received a really lovely email from a young lady here in Ohio who heard about it from Matt Logelin's retweet (thanks again, Matt!) who told me how she donated a kidney last year, and she said in part..."I would be more than happy to talk to anyone who is thinking about donating. My experience was wonderful and I don’t want someone to not donate out of fear. Everyone at OSU was incredible from the coordinator to the surgeon to the nurses. I had minimal pain and none at all as soon as the meds kicked in. I was back to work 10 days after surgery."
How great is that!??!?!
I am 100% sure we will have a donor sooner than later, whether it's family or friends or a total stranger. Keep those prayers coming, and send out positive thoughts. So far it's working beautifully!
As some of you know, and many of you don't, my love Michael Devany has a very serious kidney disease that has now resulted in the need for immediate dialysis, and a kidney transplant. Our families are being tested as live donors, and the hope is that one of us will be a match, so that he can have an immediate transplant. If he has to be on the transplant list, it's estimated to be 3-5 years before he may get a kidney.
Getting a new kidney will allow him to have a much better quality of life over the next few years, and while it is not a cure for his disease, it is definitely the best option for treatment. It keeps him from being dependent on dialysis, and allows him to live as normal life as possible.
Being a donor is much easier than you may think!
As a donor you are only in the hospital for 1-2 days, and off work for about 2 weeks. Michael's health insurance pays for everything but your time off work, including follow up appointments. We can all live normal lives with only one kidney, but you could save a life by donating one that you don't need. How amazing would that be?
Michael's blood type is O- so a donor will need to be an O as well. There is also a paired donation program which means that while he may not have a willing donor who matches him, he may have one who matches someone else, and that person has someone who matches him, etc. Thus, the reason I am posting this on my blog, to spread the word.
If you are interested in finding our more about donating, or would be willing to be tested, please call the OSU Transplant Center at 1-800-293-8965 and request a packet in Michael's name.
You may or may not have any interest in donating, and that's okay. We understand. But there are a couple of things I would like to ask you to do...
First and foremost, say a prayer for Michael, for us, and for our families as we travel down this unfamiliar road. Most importantly, pray for a live donor for him. While we have anticipated getting to this situation "at some point", we thought we had more time to plan our course. Unfortunately things have changed and now we're here. So we need all the people who we love, and who love us, to include him in your prayers.
The second thing I ask you all to do is to share this on your blog. You all have many followers....you never know who out there is in a similar situation, who has contacts as far as kidney donors that we don't have, or who might have their own live donor that doesn't match them but could be a match for us. So if you will do that for us, we would be forever grateful.
Michael and I, as well as the Devany and Reeg families, thank you from the bottom of our hearts for your support and love.
You're the best.
But when you consider the fact that I haven't blogged in over a month, I'm actually late.
So there you have it.
But tomorrow is Thanksgiving, and I figured it was a good time for me to tell you the things I am thankful for this year.
I think this one goes without saying:
We all know I love these two more than life itself. I'm very thankful to have a happy and healthy "adult" child (how is my baby going to be 22 next month??) who is really taking charge of his own future. I did something right with that one.
And his baby....God knows I love her more than is probably normal. But I can't help it.
There are a lot of reasons why I have this overwhelming love for Mora. I have never been a big dog person, even though I've had dogs since Jordan was probably 4. I just never felt that "Oh, he's my furry child" thing. I cared about them all.
Ashton was our first dog, he was a Shih Tzu, and I had to put him down when he was 2 because he had somehow licked antifreeze in a driveway while we were out trick or treating, and it caused kidney failure.
Then we had Kaya, another Shih Tzu, who I had for a couple of years before Ex and I got married. During the marriage, we got Tilda, a 2 year old black lab who had been trained to be a service dog (but failed her final test, which is why she was available to adopt), and then a month after getting Tilda I got Gracie, my little pocket Yorkie. And two months later Ex started having an affair, and everything went to hell, and he didn't want Tilda (and back then, I didn't think I wanted a big dog) so she went back to the service folks. Kaya went to live with a friend's parents who were looking for an older Shih Tzu (not a puppy) because I had my hands full with getting a divorce, finding a place to live, finding a new house, getting a new job, etc. (I'm not kidding when I say my life had exploded thanks to that fucktard's affair.) (Sorry, E, if you're still reading this!)
Then once the dust settled, and life had gone on, I was left with Gracie, and I got the bright idea that she was lonely so I ended up getting Griffin, who was also a Yorkie. *That* was the big mistake. He's got some issues, that little guy. So full of anxiety, so needy, and he has driven me insane for 7 years now. Did you ever see the Ice Age movies? Griffin is the crazy squirrel that runs around collecting acorns in that manic, crazed way.
That all brings us to Mora.
As you can tell from my history, I have only ever had small dogs. Most of which stayed 10 lbs and under fully grown. So I never watched a "puppy" grow into a big, beautiful dog. Mora was bigger as an 8 week old when Jordan brought her home, than any of my dogs have ever been fully grown! So watching her grow up...she's 6 1/2 months old now and about 70 lbs....has been so fun. I've gotten to spend so much time with her, as a puppy she was at the office every day with me because Jordan worked here too, and my boss is a dog lover and had no problems having a puppy around all the time, and even when Jordan started back to school, I still got to see her two full days a week (and I have her on Wednesdays until 8pm!). So I have fallen in love with this little lady, and believe me when I tell you, she loves Grandma too. She's my little velcro girl...when she's with me she goes everywhere I go...kitchen, bathroom, doesn't matter. She knows when Daddy pulls up to the office or into Grandma's driveway, that she's going to see me, and she gets very excited.
But most importantly, it's watching my son fall in love that has touched my heart. He loves this little girl more than he's ever loved anything in his life. He's so good with her, he's trained her, he takes care of her, he stays home with her (his social life has suffered tremendously but he knew that was a sacrifice he would make when he decided he wanted a puppy) and to see him love her this much, makes me love her even more. She brings unconditional love and joy to my son's life, and as a Mom that makes me happier than anything ever has.
It does scare me a little to think of how I am going to be when I have human grandchildren though. I can't lie. My friends are a little concerned about that too.
And just so you know, I am thankful for this guy as well:
(Ha! Everybody poses with Mora!)
We celebrated 2 years of togetherness in early August, and while we have had our ups and downs, he's still the one for me. I am in no hurry to get married again...marriage wasn't a good experience for me, and to be honest I am happy with the way we are right now. He still has his place, I have mine, we take 2 nights a week to ourselves so that we make sure to have time alone to do what we want/need to do as individuals, and that makes us stronger as a couple. I think I'm gonna renew his contract come August for another year if he keeps performing at this level. LOL
I am thankful to still have my sisters Patty and Sue Ellen with me, but I miss my parents and my sister Linda every single day. I am thankful for their families, as I have some pretty awesome nieces and nephews.
I am thankful that I have close friends who keep me sane, and who allow me to be me. Believe me when I tell you, my girls have talked me off of more than one ledge. I would not be who I am today without their advice, guidance, kicks in the ass, and various shenanigans that cannot be put into writing.
I am thankful for my health....this past month I had a scare that sent me to the hospital overnight (thought I was having a heart attack...turns out it was gastritis and a cranky gall bladder...heart is fine!) but that was enough to make me "wake up" and realize I have a lot left to do on this earth and I better get my shit together and get healthier, so that I can be around for those real human grandchildren when they arrive!
I am thankful for my job, and thankful to those clients who keep coming back for our services, and I wish them continued prosperity!
Most of all I am thankful for all the blessings I have in my life. I don't take any of them for granted. I have seen how quickly life can change and I pray every day that the people I love, and who love me, have already experienced the worst days of their lives, whatever that was, and nothing but love, health and happiness is in our futures.
Thank you all who have stayed with my blog all these years. I always think that I will try to get back to blogging regularly but it never happens. I do still try to read yours though....and keep up with your lives.
Happy Thanksgiving, friends. I wish you a blessed day.
I have many times considered deleting my blog and putting it out of it's misery. After all, I haven't posted regularly for the past two years.
I don't even think I have any followers left. LOL
OK there are two or three of you who still read me (thank you!) but everyone else has moved on.
And I don't blame them. Blogs are really kind of "so yesterday" now, aren't they? They were hot things to do for a couple of years but it seems now everybody just tweets and Facebooks anything they want known...
So since I have nothing new to report, I'll just post a few pictures of my favorite little girl, who is 5 months old now and 50 lbs and about halfway to her FULLY GROWN SIZE.
She's a beast.
And I fucking adore her.
So enjoy these pics, and I'll be back in November with More Mora! haha
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My Blog Visitors
IF THIS IS YOUR FIRST VISIT HERE....
Consider yourself warned. This blog often contains foul language and some questionable pictures that may be offensive to certain readers. Proceed at your own risk. The author is not responsible for permanent damage to your delicate psyche.
I started this blog at age 47, recently divorced and going on with my life. I'm now Fifty'ish and Fabulous! And have found my happiness again. I'm blessed to have an amazing son, a wonderful family, and friends who have stood by me through it all, and a new man in my life who brings me nothing but joy. I was lucky to marry him on Halloween, Oct 31, 2014!
This blog is my therapy, and you'll be entertained, amused, or occasionally horrified, but hopefully you'll be back for more! Thanks for reading and welcome to the blog formerly known as 47 And Starting Over!